I'D change myself to fit your preferences... Do you want me to
play dumb so you can feel smarter? Should I be your damsel in
distress? How do I look? Should I shed a few pounds or would
you
RATHER I kept myself a bit more curvacious? Should I show a little more
or cover it up? How much do you wanna see? Should I dye my
hair? Cut it? Straighten it for you? Who do you want me to
BE ? A little less black? A little less white? A little less asian? A little
less me? Would you love me more if I looked more like those
model girls? Would you like me to cater to all your needs? Should
I stop talking & thinking altogether? Come on baby, tell me how
you want
ME ...
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Friday, January 23, 2009
It Never Rains In [Northern] California...
Date: 1/23/09
Time: 11:18pm
Location: My mother's office, Rocklin, WA
Mood: Cloud 9...
...But somehow it is now. Has been for a couple days. I've been here, visitng my mom, my brother and my sister, since Tuesday (1/20). I'm in Rocklin, California and its raining. I guess I brought it with me from Washington. Fortunately, it will be 70 degrees come Monday.
I've been working for my mom since. Its awesome, 'cause I get Starbucks every morning. I swear, my family is the source of 2/3's of Starbucks' Fortune! Even my 1 1/2 year old cousin, Kaiden knows the significance of Starbucks. She has a fit if my aunt goes to Starbucks and she doesn't get her "kid's iced vanilla milk" (Starbucks' lingua franca), she throws a fit. Ridiculous, huh? I don't drink coffee if it't not Starbucks, unless I've got a caffeine withdrawal headache (yeah, i get those now! ugh!). Sad, i know... =]
My sister's Sweet Sixteen is on the 26th. Her party is tomorrow. She's having a big "Black Pearls & White Diamond" Party from 930pm - 1am. Doubt if any of them will come sober. Crazy these days, how early kids get a hold of drugs & alcohol. I've even heard of some parents buying and using with the kids. Weed, alcohol, ectasy, shrooms, Oxycotin... Not gonna lie, I went to Seattle's HempFest last year (it was AWESOME) and plan on goin again this year. But I've never "experimented" with anything else. Not interested. Tons of loaded highschool kids??? Pray for me yall. =]
So, one of the main points of visit, is to work for my mother and earn money. Plan on being able to my own apartment when I get back. At worse, maybe one with Nikki. Hopefully, I'll have enough to get a used car from around the way, and a deposit for an apartment. Don't really know how long I'm stayin out here. Bought a one-way ticket. Hope that I can come back to Washington with them; it would suck if, for some reason, i had to go home early. And coming home early will mean I will need to find a place to stay. Yay! Or not... Oh and finding a decent paying job in and around Tacoma is depressing. Big Time.
I am gonna add a post with one of my poems next...
Wait for it...
Time: 11:18pm
Location: My mother's office, Rocklin, WA
Mood: Cloud 9...
...But somehow it is now. Has been for a couple days. I've been here, visitng my mom, my brother and my sister, since Tuesday (1/20). I'm in Rocklin, California and its raining. I guess I brought it with me from Washington. Fortunately, it will be 70 degrees come Monday.
I've been working for my mom since. Its awesome, 'cause I get Starbucks every morning. I swear, my family is the source of 2/3's of Starbucks' Fortune! Even my 1 1/2 year old cousin, Kaiden knows the significance of Starbucks. She has a fit if my aunt goes to Starbucks and she doesn't get her "kid's iced vanilla milk" (Starbucks' lingua franca), she throws a fit. Ridiculous, huh? I don't drink coffee if it't not Starbucks, unless I've got a caffeine withdrawal headache (yeah, i get those now! ugh!). Sad, i know... =]
My sister's Sweet Sixteen is on the 26th. Her party is tomorrow. She's having a big "Black Pearls & White Diamond" Party from 930pm - 1am. Doubt if any of them will come sober. Crazy these days, how early kids get a hold of drugs & alcohol. I've even heard of some parents buying and using with the kids. Weed, alcohol, ectasy, shrooms, Oxycotin... Not gonna lie, I went to Seattle's HempFest last year (it was AWESOME) and plan on goin again this year. But I've never "experimented" with anything else. Not interested. Tons of loaded highschool kids??? Pray for me yall. =]
So, one of the main points of visit, is to work for my mother and earn money. Plan on being able to my own apartment when I get back. At worse, maybe one with Nikki. Hopefully, I'll have enough to get a used car from around the way, and a deposit for an apartment. Don't really know how long I'm stayin out here. Bought a one-way ticket. Hope that I can come back to Washington with them; it would suck if, for some reason, i had to go home early. And coming home early will mean I will need to find a place to stay. Yay! Or not... Oh and finding a decent paying job in and around Tacoma is depressing. Big Time.
I am gonna add a post with one of my poems next...
Wait for it...
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
2009, iTS ALL ABoUT CHANGE...
Date: 13 January 2009
Time: 7:25PM
Location: Yia Yia J's House, Tacoma, WA
Mood: Focused...
Well, its a new year and there are a few things that I have realized in the last few months:
I've figured out what I wanna do for the first half of the rest of my life. I wanna get my BA in American Ethnic Studies, and then go to Japan and teach English. Then, I wanna go somewhere else and teach English. There are programs all over the world for that sort of thing. My understanding is that is pays well and I know that I would have so much fun. I want to be able to travel and seeing as how I'm pretty broke like a lot of other people, this seems the best way to do it.
Also, I've realized that since there is so much that I wanna do, I need to focus 100% on getting there. The thing that this means most is: NO BOYS. Men, maybe haha. Joking...partly haha =]. But, what I mean to say is that, dating can be such a distraction, and I dont feel that there is anyone my age who can be the man I would need them to be for me. Does that make sense? I mean, I'm too old to be playing games, but that doesnt necessarily mean that I'm old enough to settle down. I would like to hurry up and find that one person who I am supposed to be with forever so that I dont deal with all the bullshit in between, but thats unrealistic for the most part. I dont want some guy whos WAY older than me, and all the guys my age are mostly still into partying and games. I want someone who is goal-oriented, serious yet fun, honest, trustworthy, and a non-practicer of Stoicism =]. Maybe thats too much lol. I have just come across lots of guys who are no where near having their shit together. Dont think it'll happen for my age group for another....say...5 years?? Not to be offensive, but there are only a handful of the "good ones," and they are probably already taken. Am I right? Plus, nowadays, EVERYONE is getting pregnant, and I dont want to be one of them. Dont need anything holding me back from my dreams.
I have a ways to go before I can get there, but when I do, it'll all be worth it.
Time: 7:25PM
Location: Yia Yia J's House, Tacoma, WA
Mood: Focused...
Well, its a new year and there are a few things that I have realized in the last few months:
I've figured out what I wanna do for the first half of the rest of my life. I wanna get my BA in American Ethnic Studies, and then go to Japan and teach English. Then, I wanna go somewhere else and teach English. There are programs all over the world for that sort of thing. My understanding is that is pays well and I know that I would have so much fun. I want to be able to travel and seeing as how I'm pretty broke like a lot of other people, this seems the best way to do it.
Also, I've realized that since there is so much that I wanna do, I need to focus 100% on getting there. The thing that this means most is: NO BOYS. Men, maybe haha. Joking...partly haha =]. But, what I mean to say is that, dating can be such a distraction, and I dont feel that there is anyone my age who can be the man I would need them to be for me. Does that make sense? I mean, I'm too old to be playing games, but that doesnt necessarily mean that I'm old enough to settle down. I would like to hurry up and find that one person who I am supposed to be with forever so that I dont deal with all the bullshit in between, but thats unrealistic for the most part. I dont want some guy whos WAY older than me, and all the guys my age are mostly still into partying and games. I want someone who is goal-oriented, serious yet fun, honest, trustworthy, and a non-practicer of Stoicism =]. Maybe thats too much lol. I have just come across lots of guys who are no where near having their shit together. Dont think it'll happen for my age group for another....say...5 years?? Not to be offensive, but there are only a handful of the "good ones," and they are probably already taken. Am I right? Plus, nowadays, EVERYONE is getting pregnant, and I dont want to be one of them. Dont need anything holding me back from my dreams.
I have a ways to go before I can get there, but when I do, it'll all be worth it.
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